Two Questions...

Question 1: Why is it that the computer I am working on always acts goofy?

I have four computers in my house. Three are hooked up with internet connections. It doesn't seem to matter which one I sit down I choose to work on, it always acts up. Invariably, I will spend some 2-3 hours fighting with malware removers, virus scans, updates, restarts, you name, just to get the thing going again. And these are not old computers. They are fairly decent, well-maintained and very orderly systems. I know that it is the computer I am working on because eventually, I will overcome its problems, but in the meantime, if someone else is working one of the others, I will ask "Are you able to post or are you able to open this or that?" and they will answer "No problem here!" "Mine is working! Did you try to restart? Did you run a malware scan? Did you update? Did you brush your teeth? Did you fix lunch? Are you getting up soon? Would bring me a sammich? Did you see the free multi-billion dollar giveaway for anyone named Brendan Carroll on Facebook? It expired ten minutes ago!"

Question 2: What is sexy about this image? Of course, I know he doesn't appeal to me because I am strictly interested in vampires et.al. of the female race. But this was one of the most popular versions of Vlad ever. He looks nothing at all like the Twilight fellow, but in comparison, I think I would take this one over that one because that one is stuck in high school forever and I don't know if anyone has noticed, but the price of sending a kid to high school has sky-rocketed. Personally, I would rather be associated with the older fellow simply out of economic concerns. If anyone thinks our man above is sexier than our man below, please let me know.

Composite Edition: The Knight of Death and The King of Terrors

By tomorrow at this time, I hope to be able to offer my latest publication: The Red Cross of Gold I & II at Amazon Kindle for only $3.99 for both books. This is a savings of $2.00 off the price of buying them separately. Here is a preview of the book cover as it will appear when the Amazon meatgrinder spits it out. I'll be back with the link ASAP.

Vampires and the Truth Thereof...

In truth vampires are simply a remake of the quintessential bad boy represented by any number of men (and women)over the past few decades. Characters played by Clint Eastwood, James Dean, Marlon Brando, Elvis Presley, Johnny Depp, Sharon Stone, just to name a few, have struck a chord deep in the hearts and minds of both men and women. Stories about the sometimes naughty, sometimes hilarious, sometimes erotic adventures of other people have always caught the attention of the audience whether they be tribal people listening to the clan storyteller around a hearth fire or a group of giggling teenyboppers in an Imax theater. These characters give color, depth and adventure to even the most boring life and replace the imaginations of those totally without imaginative powers of their own. For those endowed with imaginations, the possibilities and variations on a theme are endless and trail off into infinity like images from the Hubble Space Telescope.
The never-ending stream of vampire centered literature gives credence to the idea that too much is not enough when it comes to vampiric tales.
Lately, I have noticed that the world of vampire characters has evolved to such an extent that we have have developed distinct divisions amongst the vampire fans currently devouring books about their favorite bad guys and gals like mini-blackholes. We have "Twilight" Vampires that sparkle in direct sunlight instead of burning to cinders. We have what I call "Retro" Vampires that are allergic to garlic, sizzle in sunlight and can't be seen in mirrors. These are elegantly attired, handsome fellows or beautiful ladies, with perfect hair and makeup and a hunger for 'real love' in addition to a lust for blood. Then we have the "Traditional" Vampires who are a bit naughty, somewhat glamorous and just plain wanton and power-hungry. These fight each other for supremacy and have rules and societies like "Underworld" and "Lestat".
Last, we have a developing reversion to the "Old School" Vampires. Ugly, horrible, wretched creatures with only a thirst for blood driving them.
Personal, I think that they are all pretty interesting and worth exploring. I'm rather skeptical of the vampire/werewolf combos. Just can't see that happening.
It is very difficult at this stage in the vampire games to come up with new and original slants on the vampire angle, but I did give it a try in my series. Some very interesting things come to light in Book XXII about the blood-drinking idea. I mean, I have everything else in the Assassin Chronicle Series, why not a couple of vampires?

What is it about Zombies...

...that people love? I recently watched a movie called "Zombieland". It was hilarious. I laughed out loud several times and was amazed that I enjoyed the ridiculous production. Surely, it was the humor, the actors' performances, (Bill Murray), and the utter foolishness that made it worthwhile. I felt the same way about "Super Troopers". Ridiculous, gutter humor that made me laugh and took me away from everything sane for a little while. There is a whole list of movies like these two: Police Squad, Airplane, Police Academy, Blues Brothers, Saturday the 14th, Scream.
But I'm not talking about those zombies. I'm talking about serious zombie movies. "The Living Dead"; "Resident Evil"; "Day of the Dead"; etc. Mutant disease runs rampant. People die, nasty corpses get reanimated, more people die, blood and gore get splattered, zombies get splattered, more people get infected, more zombies attack, more blood and gore, a handful of people escape. Same story, different scenery.
Just how many different ways can a zombie bite a person? How many different ways can a zombie be destroyed? How many zombies are there? How many zombie books can be written? Sold? Read? Re-read?
I thought of writing a zombie novel, but then thought that I would have to read a whole slough of current zombie novels in order to make sure that my zombies were different, hid in different places, made different noises, dressed differently and bit off body parts in novel ways that no other zombie novelist had thought of. After giving this some thought, I decided to stick with Templars... aha!
How many books about Templars can be written, you may ask. What do people like about Templars, etc? But my novels are not ABOUT Templars, it stars Templars in the modern age. Now there is a much smaller category.
The way I see it, if you are tired of zombies, read about Templers.

Preview Sample: the Dead Confess No Sins

Mark Andrew smiled slightly at his son and kicked his horse. Most likely, it was the presence of the Djinni that allowed him to maintain control over these shades from the past. In his current condition, he would have been hard-pressed to command them at all. He rode into the circle and turned his horse about, looking at them. They sat staring at him coldly, assessing him from their deep eyes.

“I am John Mark Andrew Larmenius Ramsay, Chevalier du Morte, Poor Knight of Solomon’s Temple, King of Terrors, Prince of the Grace, Watcher of the Seventh Gate.” He addressed them with as much vigor as he could muster as he continued to turn the horse in a tight circle. “Some of you I know personally and others I do not. I rode with some of you in battle and I saw some of you fall. Some of you, I helped along to meet death!” A murmur, not quite words went along the ranks of the mounted soldiers. Their horses moved about, jostling one another.

“How do we know you are who you say you are?!” A heavily accented voice boomed in the silence. “You do not look like a Knight of Christ to me!!” Several bursts of laughter accompanied this outburst. Certainly the owner of this objection was correct.

Mark Andrew turned his horse to face the man who had cast this insult at him.

“I know you, Gerard d’Belleau! I saw you fall in a drunken brawl at an opium den in Aleppo! Over some dancing girl, was it? A harlot with a mole on her left cheek? Not her face, mind you! You were an arrogant ass then and I see you still carry your backside on your shoulders!”

Gerard’s mouth fell open and another; louder guffaw erupted further down the circle.

Mark Andrew turned his horse again and glared at the laughing man. A large, red-haired fellow holding one of the banners.

“Oh and wot wud ye be laughin’ at, Caleb MacDougall? I saw ye foll from yur horse onto a viper when ye wair runnin’ away from battle! Dunna ye remembar ’ow ye begged me t’ kill ye when th’ poison set in?”

“And I dare say you obliged him?” Another, more educated, English accent questioned him from the opposite side of the circle.

Mark reined the horse about and galloped across the circle, pulling up short in front of a tall, slender Knight sitting astride a dark horse with a long broadsword clasped in his gloved hand. Gold flashed on his buckles and a pheasant’s feather adorned his helmet. Decorations not approved by the Order’s dress code.

“And I dare say that I did. Unlike you, I had mercy on my Brother! Did you never feel the least bit of remorse for helping send the Grand Master to the stake? How much did good King Philipe le Bel pay you to whisper in his ear the crimes of which we were accused, Brother?” Mark Andrew raised his chin slightly and the English Knight’s face drained of color.

No one knew of his treachery. The Templar’s eyes widened in shock. No one. He let out a bellow and slid from his horse.

“I know you,” Mark Andrew continued in a low voice full of contempt. “I know you well, but I will not sully my tongue with the sound of your cursed name. Have you learned nothing of humility? Have you learned nothing in all these years?”

“Come down off that horse! This is an abomination! I would not follow you into battle! You are a devil or worse!”

Mark Andrew slid from the horse and grunted audibly when his feet hit the ground. He rose up slowly and pulled the golden sword from the scabbard. The Knight’s eyes bugged at the sight of the twisted golden blade glinting in the moonlight, but he did not back down. He threw back his mantel and raised his own broadsword. His gold and silver spurs jangled as he stepped lightly, squaring off with the Lord of the Seventh Gate.

Mark Andrew fought him without the advantage of gloves, gauntlets, helmet or shield. Within a bare few minutes, he had disarmed the Knight, much to his chagrin and he lay in the dirt on his back as his Brothers looked on in wonder. Mark Andrew turned away from him and limped back toward his horse. The Knight got to his feet behind him, drew his long knife from his belt and charged at his back.

“Head’s up, Father!” Lemarik shouted a warning.

Mark Andrew raised the sword, stepped forward, dipped slightly and swung around to face his persistent, yet foolish, attacker. The belligerent Englishman’s head left his body very cleanly, flipping over and over as if in slow motion. It smacked the rocks behind the circle of Knights with a sickening thud and a low groan circled through the rank of mounted Knights. The headless corpse slapped the dust in front of the Knight of Death, sending up a small cloud of white powder. Within moments, it had disappeared, gone back to the halls of dust and ashes.

Mark Andrew sheathed the golden sword and climbed wearily back into the saddle, reining the stallion about, looking at each of the men in the circle, silently giving the invitation to any who would follow the Englishman.

“As I was saying, Brothers, I am John Mark Andrew Larmenius Ramsay, Chevalier du Morte, King of Terrors, Prince of the Grave and I have called you all here to give you a chance to redeem your souls. If any of you wish to step down, do so now!” He rode about the circle making eye contact with each and every one of them once more, before continuing.

“Now here is the lay of it…” He began to tell them of what they were about to face.

The Assassin Chronicles Book #21, the Dead Confess No Sins, will be published some time next month. It is the 21st book in the Red Cross of Gold Series published at Amazon.com in both Kindle and Paperback form also available at Smashwords.com, the Ibook Store and Barnes and Noble.
The Assassin Chronicles follow the adventures of a modern day alchemist and Knight of the Temple as he works his way back to his original purpose after losing more than just his memory in a botched assassin's mission. The adventure begins in Book I:. The Knight of Death http://www.amazon.com/dp/B001J6ORUI

Guest Blog at Sarah Hadad's "Lit and Laundry"

I have been featured on Sarah Hadad's blogsite today at "Lit and Laundry". Check it out:
http://litandlaundry.blogspot.com/

Thanks Sarah!

Hello Out There! Anyone Home?

I recently got a few of my books up and running in DTB (paperback) and a couple more at Smashwords which allows greater distribution and more e-format downloading options. However, Smashwords has stopped selling for me altogether. I've gotten no sales according to my reports since early May. I wrote to them because I keep seeing numbers of downloads change though I see no sales. The answer was that they were working on it.

Working on what? I wonder. Some of my fellow authors, Mr. Patterson, for example say that they have many sales on Smashwords. I cannot believe that I've not sold a single book there in over two months. Strange.

What is really strange is that my book sales on Amazon in both ebook and paperback have increased and that means people are reading my books and coming back and buying the series. This naturally makes me think: "Hey! Someone out there likes the books!" This is good, but total silence in the review section and few, if any, emails makes me wonder if the books are being bought by robots or maybe from passing ET's who have sent emails and reviews from millions of light years away and I simply haven't received their wonderous comments yet. Or perhaps they are being purchased by Time Travelers who have posted in the future. Hmmmm? Am I onto something? Could it be that we are being studied as a race through the Red Cross of Gold series? How would that change the destiny of the human race I wonder?

Now for Something Completely Different...

By now, most everyone who follows my erratic path through the world as a prolific, but dirt poor and unknown literary genius (:IMHO:), has seen my Red Cross of Gold series obsession Assassin Chronicles. I know it might go against the grain for me to announce that I have other subject matter in my portfolio of novels. At this very moment, I am waiting for one of my earlier forays into the world of publishing to come to life as a Kindle publication. For a short time, I have listed the book as low as Amazon would allow: $1.00 (one measley dollar, one buck, uno dolares, a single greenback, less than a cup of coffee in a cheap vending machine, one dollah-Amellican money). This work was one of my most emotionally packed undertakings of all time. My great love for the Austrian born composer whose life was cut short in the late eighteenth century prompted me to write a tribute to him based on the premise of what he might think of today's world if only he had the opportunity to be here with us. If ever time travel proves economical enough for me to indulge, I would request the privilege to see Wolfgang Mozart conducting one of his own operas or perhaps a symphony or playing his piano for his friends and family. Such would be the dream to end all dreams for this author.

The name of the book is Tempo Rubato which is a Latin musical term for Stolen Time. I hope that you may(pardon the pun) find the time to take a look at it.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B002MPPOZW

Happy Reading!! Best Wishes! Brendan Carroll