Monday, October 26, 2009

Something Special

I had a very pleasant experience yesterday. I had breakfast with a dear friend of mine at IHOP and she presented me with a Halloween gift.

Its a pumpkin shaped bottle of Peach Mojito Mixer. Very funny and yummy. In keeping with the theme... Halloween... we had the Pumpkin Pancakes. Also yummy. We talked of many things important and non-important, but the main thing is that we talked and we had a good time. Now I have this pumpkin-shaped bottle full of mixer and every time I look at it, I am reminded of my good friend and IHOP pumpkin pancakes.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


I'm pretty sure that this is Chinese, but it could be something else. The Red Star on the yellow hat is a good clue, but you never know.
I like little things and I like to attribute human characteristics to animals. There is a fancy terminology for that, but I can't remember what it is now. The frog looks like he's smiling and waving. Makes you wonder.
I like little things. I have a lot of little things in my house and I'm always attracted to tiny little objects in shops and such. I fail to understand how we can manufature such little things, some of them so small we can't even see them. Nanotechnology it is called. I remember the first time I heard the word 'nano'. It was on an episode of Star Trek, but I don't remember which series. Some sort of nanites were attacking the ship and the crew. Of course, they were defeated, but I thought they were fascinating (pardon the pun). But now I'm off the subject completely.
The frog in the hat. This put me in a strange frame of mind when I saw it. "I has a hat". It made me realize for the first time that animals own nothing. They not only own nothing, they do not need to own anything. I've tried to imagine what that would be like to own absolutely nothing and I think it must equate to true freedom.
I heard something on the radio yesterday that a man called Lord Mountain or some such from England... one of the lesser nobility. Anyhoo, he was speaking about America and he said that our President is about to sign something that would end American Freedom forever. It has to do with Global Warming and Carbon Emissions. I listened to it with a feeling that things really are about to change forever. That things are always changing... forever changing. I changed the station and there I heard something equally disturbing. Our President has plans for regulating the Internet. Hmmmm. Regulating? Don't we have enough regulating now?
Let's change something back once in a while. Let's take a restriction off, I thought.
Then I looked on the internet news and saw something about Obama decriminalizing marijuana. I didn't even read it.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Astonishing Revelations

Grandchildren are the most wonderful creatures. They certainly make you sit up and take notice of what you may have caused inadvertantly to have been unleashed upon the land. My own grandchildren are both less than five years old. Between the two of them they count about seven years total, but they seem to have life down fairly well already. How is it that one of such a venerable age as myself can be so intimidated by just speaking on the phone to such an elvish little creature that I am left speechless. The conversations are very mature in the sense that I find them very one-sided with room only for a few 'Yeahs' and 'Nos' and 'Oh, reallys?' on my part while the words gush out from the other end of the line covering all manner of subjects from Spongebob Squarepants (of whom I know very little) to the weather to medical conditions and the treatment thereof (scraped knees, cut fingers, poked eyes, etc.) These are certainly special conversations and will be treasured in my mind for the rest of my life. And they also know how to put down hecklers (parents) in the background by simply shouting 'No!' or 'Would you please be quiet? I'm on the phone!' It's funny how this works for a three-year-old, but not a fifty-three-year-old. And last, but not least, you learn interesting things about your children (parents of these elvish delights) by simply listening. You don't even have to ask to learn that daddy got a ticket for speeding or mommy rocked on the cat's tail and threw her dinner plate across the room. Interesting. Very interesting. Gotta love 'em.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Book XV:. the Skull of Sidon

The Red Cross of Gold XV:. the Skull of Sidon is now available on Kindle. Just in time for the Halloween Season!!

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Attention Kindle Indie authors!! Godzilla has been making plans to steal all of the really good books on Kindle since Amazon went International. The above picture was taken by my parrot, Polly, after she infiltrated a top secret meeting in Japan only a few hours ago. My good friend, Maureen Miller, had become a victim of this dastardly plot, but Polly assures me that she will soon be grasping Widow's Tale in her claws and winging her way home with it.

The rest of you... beware! Of course, I'd be willing to rent out Polly for a small fee... just sayin'!

Friday, October 9, 2009

Polly's New Word/Missing Puglet Poster

Oh, I forgot to tell you what the word was, didn't I?



Birthday Gratitude

I know that I'm late posting about all the wonderful birthday wishes I received from people who really don't know how old I really am. Thank you to all my fans and readers and even to those persons who are pea-green with jealousy whenever my name is mentioned, but who sucked up with everyone else and wished me Birthday Greetings simply to be coooooooooooooool. I was thrilled by all the attention, truly I was, but I wanted to share something with those who really care about me: A picture of the best birthday gift I've ever received.
The above gift was a special delivery and what a surprise!! I abosolutely adore my new pet. Of course, I can't go in the backyard as often I used to and I'm still looking for Puglet. I think she got jealous and ran away. Yesterday, I actually taught my new parrot to speak a word.
(As you all know, parrots learn to speak many words through hearing it repititiously) Anyway you can imagine how proud I am of teaching my parrot, whom I've named Polly, her first word in such a short time. I've only had her for 3 days now. As soon as the shark cage arrives, I plan to spend much more time with her in the afternoons. The neighbors (the ones who still live nearby) say that they feel a lot safer with Polly around. She's much better than any watchdog I've ever had (I wonder where Puglet's gotten off to?) She doesn't make a lot of noise, but she sure puts the fear into those pesky would-be burglars, meter readers, mail carriers, sales reps, Girl Scouts, bike riders, street sweepers and joggers. I haven't seen any of them around lately and the street I live on is much more peaceful which is good for my new night shift job.

Thanks again, Miss Miller, for the new parrot! I love you! Brendan

1st Week Results Are In

The first week at the new job has passed without incident largely due to the above sign which was posted in the lobby. When I first saw the sign painted at eye-level near the main entrance door, I thought "Well, duh!!". I don't know why this sign is not posted everywhere! Just think of all the injuries that could be avoided by the simple posting of one sign.

I know, I know... paint is expensive, but honestly, I believe that employees everywhere would be willing to put a little in the kitty to buy a can of red spray paint, some magic markers and a stencil kit for Pete's sake.

How many times have I completely bombed out when falling on rough or wet surfaces and how many times could I have been spared fractures, concussions and wrenched or torn ligaments, tendons and muscles due to sheer ignorance? A little ingenuity could have saved me tons of money, years of therapy and a boatload of embarrassment had I but known to fall carefully.

Think about it, people. Be safe. Live long and prosper: Fall Carefully.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Goat Meat Capitol of the World!!

Well, yes, people around here take their goats very seriously and it seems that everyone around either owns goats, used to own goats, is thinking of buying some goats or lives next door to someone who owns goats. I've learned some interesting things about goats simply by association. For instance, goats normally graze in one direction even moreso than cattle. I mean they all point in the same direction when they graze. Goats invented the old adage: The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side of the Fence. Goats like to walk single-file if possible. Goats are not afraid of heights. Goats will eat trees. Goats DO NOT eat tin cans (that is an urban legend or else only urban goats eat tin cans, not country goats).

You have to hold your mouth just right to talk about goats. You have to pronounce the word just right or else everyone will know that 'you ain't from round these parts, are ye?'

One of the most alarming things I learned about owning goats came from the lady who works at the cleaners. You see, she owns gotes. You got say gotes real fast and make it sound sort of heavy and clipped somehow to get the inflection right. Anyhow, she went out one day and found 15 of her goats dead! Just keeled over dead in the field. Now, why would your goats just keel over dead in the field? Well, she didn't know. Gotes are just like that, you see? You'll just walk out and there they'll be: dead!

Now, I don't know about you, but if fifteen of my goats just up and died, I'd be curious about what kilt 'em. I'd have to say "Hey! Why're my gotes dead?! What th'bleep?!"

But I queried several goat owners and learned that this is not unusual, that goats just up and die, that it's to be expected. I just cannot accept that! If ever I do own a goat, I'm going to make sure that if I do find him dead (or her) and it's not immediately evident that he/she was not the victim of alien mutilation, I shall take the remains to Texas A & M and say "Hey! What th' bleep happened to this here gote?!" I gotta know.

This is what I do best especially when the world becomes too much to handle. It's hard losing all three friends in the space of one week. It is beyond the mind's capability to comprehend or fully absorb, but the rain is good for washing away the mental pollution that comes from too much thinking.